


in the night

by laykay



Category: The Wilds (TV 2020)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Toni has PTSD, let's be honest they all do, one year post-rescue, so does Shelby
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 16:41:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28430310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/laykay/pseuds/laykay
Summary: It had been a while since she’d been woken up by screaming.So when Shelby was woken up by screams in the middle of the night, her head against a pillow and a warm blanket covering her body, her initial thought was that Toni was awake and watching a horror movie.  But Toni was in bed next to her, arms and legs thrashing as she fought against the blanket on top of her.
Relationships: Shelby Goodkind/Toni Shalifoe
Comments: 7
Kudos: 372





	in the night

It had been a while since she’d been woken up by screaming.

On the island, it was a common occurrence to be woken up by screams, she would open her eyes and see a shadow moving, going to comfort whoever was having the nightmare. It turned into a kind of unspoken agreement between them, they went in shifts, one waking up to calm another so the other six could get some semblance of sleep. 

Of course, the chain was often broken as there was no controlling who would be having the nightmares on a given night. On rare nights it was silent, everyone was able to sleep. Some nights they were all on their own, all with separate dreams of the same nightmare they were living. And some nights a dream was so dark and so violent, that it took all seven of them to bring one back to reality. Not that their reality at that point was much better. 

So when Shelby was woken up by screams in the middle of the night, her head against a pillow and a warm blanket covering her body, her initial thought was that Toni was awake and watching a horror movie. But Toni was in bed next to her, arms and legs thrashing as she fought against the blanket on top of her.

She reached over to put her hand softly against Toni’s chest, something they’d discovered worked on the island most of the time, a physical touch to let them know it was okay, that they weren’t alone, and to allow them to feel something real as opposed to the pain their dream-self was feeling. They’d also learned to keep a distance while doing this, as sometimes a touch would send the sleeping girl into even further hysterics and a fist would come flying up, but Shelby wasn’t keeping her distance from Toni, even though she knew Toni was a puncher. Her sleep demons were what had taught them that lesson when she gave Leah a black eye.

Toni’s arms were mostly restricted by the blanket, Shelby prayed she would be able to bring her back before she managed to fight her way out. “Toni,” she said softly, hoping her voice would break through. “Toni, baby, it’s me. You’re okay. You’re home. You’re safe.”

She moved her hand from Toni’s chest to her cheek, her thumb softly stroking below her ear. Toni gasped softly, eyes still closed, her breathing was uneven, but the screaming and thrashing had stopped. “You’re okay,” Shelby told her again. “I’m right here.”

Shelby didn’t move as Toni’s breathing steadied, she leaned her forehead against hers as Toni’s hand moved to rest over the hand on her cheek. “It’s okay, baby. It’s okay.” Shelby kissed her forehead then her cheek.

She slowly started to shift back to her side of the bed, but Toni made a tiny noise of protest followed by a soft “don’t.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Shelby told her, wrapping an arm around her and snuggling against her side.

\----

Shelby looked up as Toni wandered from their bedroom to the kitchen in search of coffee, she couldn’t help smiling. Even though she wasn’t a morning person, early morning Toni was her favorite. Before she’d had her coffee and a shower, Toni turned into something like a giant, groggy toddler. Yawning loudly, she’d sit at the counter with her head in her hands and whine that it was too early, the sun was barely up and, if the sun was up, it was too bright. Shelby thought it was adorable.

That morning though, Toni was silent as she walked to the kitchen, she sat on the stool at the counter, arms crossed in front of her, watching Shelby as she busied herself making breakfast. Toni only managed to nod her head in thanks as Shelby put a cup of coffee down in front of her.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” Shelby asked.

Toni gave no indication that she’d heard her, wrapping her hands around her coffee cup as she looked down into the dark liquid.

“That hasn’t happened in a while,” Shelby said. “Is everything okay?”

Toni nodded silently, not looking away from her coffee.

“I called us both off of work. Neither of us got much sleep last night, we’d both be completely useless anyway, so you can just relax today.”

“Thanks,” Toni muttered.

A silence fell between them again as Toni continued looking into her coffee, not drinking it. “Do you want me to get in touch with the others?” Shelby finally asked, breaking the silence. “You know, see if they’re up for a Zoom call today?”

Toni shook her head.

“They’d want to know. They’d want to be there for you,” Shelby told her, but again Toni was silent. “It’s nothing to be embarrassed about, it happens. Should I call your therapist? Maybe she can squeeze you in…”

“Jesus, Shelby, will you stop?” Toni finally snapped. “For like two seconds, can you just fucking stop? I don’t wanna talk to anybody!”

Neither of them spoke for a moment. There was no apology, as there normally was after one of them raised their voice to the other. Instead, Toni’s head dropped back down so she was looking into her coffee once more.

“Okay,” Shelby finally said. “I’m just gonna go take a shower then, leave you alone for a bit.” She picked up a plate from beside the stove, placing it in front of Toni. “Made your favorite,” she told her before leaving the kitchen.

Toni’s eyes shifted to the blueberry pancakes, sighing when she heard the bathroom door click shut.

\----

When Shelby came out of the bathroom, Toni was sitting on the couch, the TV was on but Shelby could tell Toni wasn’t actually watching it. “Are you feeling any better?” she asked carefully.

“I guess,” Toni mumbled.

“Well, at least you’re talking. Kind of.” She moved to sit next to her. “We can talk about it, you know? If you don’t want to talk to anyone else, you can always talk to me.”

Toni nodded, not looking at Shelby. “I know.”

“You know, I have dreams too sometimes,” Shelby started. “That I’m back out there. Even though it’s been almost a year, I can remember every minute like it was yesterday.”

“Yeah,” Toni responded simply. She closed her eyes briefly then shook her head. “Can we just not talk about it? I just don’t wanna think about it anymore right now. Maybe later but…”

“Okay,” Shelby said, reaching over to take her hand. “I’m right here. Whatever you need, or don’t need. Just whatever, I’m here.”

Toni shifted over to her, putting her head against her shoulder. “Can we just sit here? I just wanna sit here.”

“Of course,” Shelby whispered, kissing the top of her head softly. “As long as you want.”

“Actually, will you do something for me?” Toni asked after a moment.

“Anything.”

“Will you sing?”

Shelby smiled at the soft request, kissing Toni’s head again, she sang the first song that came to her mind. She wasn't sure it would help in the moment, but she sang it anyway. “I’m gonna pop some tags, only got twenty dollars in my pocket…” As she continued the song, she heard the best sound that she could have hoped for that day: Toni laughed.


End file.
